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aut me aut nihil

aut me aut nihil = Either me or nothing. no,no... me not boosting. me have an inferiority complex and trying to compensate :D 

Thursday, May 26, 2005 - 11:50

Coma colorless

Warning: Folks, inspired by my accident, i wrote this story thinking so many stuff. The first draft was twice as long and felt like a science lecture. So please feel free to remind me that i suck at creating fantasy.

Chapter-I "Blue colored sheet"

The last thing i remember was staring into the headlights of that truck. The next thing i remember is waking up in a hospital. I knew it was a hospital because of the smell. I tried to get up when my friend standing next to the bed said, "Relax hero, lie down. You are still in shock from the accident."
"Oh.. i hit that truck is it? How bad is my bike?"
"Blummer.. you stupid.. we were worried about you. and idiot you are worried about.. your bike? You were in a coma for almost fourteen hours now, you know that?"
"No it wasn't coma." said a female voice entering the room, which belonged to a young lady with a sthescope around her neck.
"Hi, i'm Dr. Sneha. I've been taking care of you."
"Hello doctor."
"Hello doctor. Why do you say it wasn't a coma?", asked Aamir.
"Because coma is dreamless and you were dreaming last night. I saw REM. Rapid Eye Movement."
"Oh i see. So what are my damages? My friend here won't even let me get up."
"So far we have seen, from your CAT scan, X-ray & other reports, you are perfectly normal. Not a scratch."
"So why was i out cold for the entire night." i asked.
She took time to see both of us in the eye before she continued, "You received a heavy blow to your skull which made you unconsicious. Although you weren't hurt physically because of your helmet, there is a small chance that the blow might have affected your memory in some way. What i am saying is there is a possibility that you might have forgotten something..."
"Forgotten? Like my passwords?", i asked slightly alarmed.
Aamir added, "Yeah, i know a friend who forgot his handwriting after an accident. He couldn't even sign his name as he used to."
The doctor continued, "So dont be scared if you dont remember something. It is not abnormal especially after an accident. Its my duty to inform you that... and now im taking your leave. You can go home anytime you want."
"Thank you doctor"
"Thank you doctor"
"Just sign the blue colored discharge sheet with the nurse before you leave. Thank you." said Sneha and was about to leave the room when suddenly i realised what i have forgotten.
"Shit!!"
"What happened? You don't remember your signature?", asked Aamir.
"No i remember that. But i dont know see colors...everything is black & white!!"
"What!! You mean you don't see colors after the accident?", asked Sneha.
"Yes"
"Oh my God!", exclaimed Aamir.


Chapter-II "Common sense"

"I feel like a color TV with bad reception. Its like the chip that processes color in my brain is smashed or something. Is there anyway i can get my colored vision back doctor?"
"hmmm... this is a very specific problem. I believe, similar to all other senses like smell or touch... colors are also coded in your genes."
"coded?" asked Aamir.
"Yeah.. you see nobody has to teach a kid that a smell is bad or good. Or the sense of taste and touch is already present in you when you are born."
"So what are you saying? My gene got altered because of the accident and i forgot colors?"
"No, you are the same before and after the accident. But something is missing.....wait a minute..the `Weaver bird` experiment!"
"Yeah i know that experiment. What about it?", i said.
"Wweaver birds breeded in captivity were denied twigs and coir to build their nest and they never saw their parents do it either. But when the fourth generation birds were provided the twigs they built a perfect nest."
"Because...?", asked Aamir.
"Because the nest building skill was already in their genes. Nobody had to teach them. Twigs were the missing entry. Your case is similar to this."
"So you mean... i know all the colors, i can see all the colors, but someone/something is denying me that?"
"Yeah something like that."
Aamir noted, "Thank God, that you haven't forgotten your common sense. That would have been more difficult."
Sneha said, "Yeah it would have been so much simple if common sense, whats good & whats bad, religious faith are also coded in one's gene. But they are the qualities we learn by experience and treat it as more important."
"Thats all very interesting but will i get my sight back?", i asked getting a bit impatient in a black and white world.
A long silence followed.
I was worried.
Aamir seemed Mr. Head on shoulder.
Sneha was thoughtful for a moment and lighted up like she found the answer. She was very excited when she said, "Its a dream. It makes sense. You knew about Weaver birds. Dreams are colorless."
Aamir smiled like he understood what she said.
"What are you talking about? Dream?"
"Yeah, open your eyes." said Aamir.

Chapter-III "Deja vu"

I opened my eyes. I was in a bed and could smell the hospital. I turned around and saw my wife Sneha and my friend Aamir besides the bed.
Sneha said, "Thank God! You woke up. I was so worried."
"Oh.. i hit that truck is it? How bad is my bike?"
Aamir said, "you stupid.. we were worried about you. and idiot you are worried about.. your bike? You were in a coma for almost fourteen hours now, you know that?"
"No, it wasn't a coma. Coma is dreamless, but i was dreaming. A very wierd dream... which i'll tell you. But first... this room is painted green right?"

Dedication: To my helmet. If you didnt like the story blame it on the helmet, that i lost my creativity in the accident. :D

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Wednesday, May 11, 2005 - 02:50

Misfit

Misfit

Inspired by who am i?, who got inspired by a softer world.

Suggestions for a title other than `Colored glass` are welcome. Or help me chose between `finer things`, `aut me aut nihil`, `my stained view`, `Vini, Vici, Vidi` ??

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Friday, May 06, 2005 - 04:11

Chocolate supplement

Note: Hey guys, i'm back. This time i'm doing a monologue of a girl. Please forgive my ignorance on the subject, but what matters is... that i tried. So here u go...

I love chocolate. Which girl doesnt huh? There are only two other things that I love the same way as chocolate. My brother. Although he was six years elder to me -which would make him twenty six years old- we were always like classmate friends. He made up for my dad, who died when i was young. He was very sweet and the greatest brother any sister can get. And the other thing is, I love the kiss from my boyfriend. The intoxicating sensation you feel when you are kissing the guy you love. Those are the three things I love, not in any specific order, mind you.
I invited my boyfriend over for dinner at my place with my family and then we were supposed to go to a movie together, but actually we were going back his place and a movie was the last thing on my mind. Nevertheless, I was a bit nervous since it was the first time I invited him over and I so wanted them to like him. I cooked the food myself with some help from my mom and brother.

Half way through the cooking when mom was out of earshot my brother out of the blue asked me,
"So kid, you love this guy?"
".....", i was blank. But after the initial shock i managed a, "I think im anna. No let me rephrase that..I know i'm in love."
"Ok, he seems a pretty good guy."
"When did you meet him?"
"No i didnt meet him kid. I saw you that day with him at the mall. So i made a few checks myself. And what do you know, he checked out fine." he said, gave me a pat on my back, pinched my cheeks, and went out of the kitchen.
You never seize to amaze me. Love you anna. mmuuaaahhh.
I almost finished the cooking when I heard my boyfriend arrive lead into the house by my brother. After the pleasantries and some drilling question from my mom -none from my brother bcos he already knew about him- we sat down for dinner. Everybody enjoyed the food i thought. We cited the movie timing and made a move out. Mom called out to drive safe and reach safely.
The moment we were out of the door, he said, "Shit! I did a stupid thing in there."
"What did you do? Stop freaking me out!"
"Damn, you know you were sitting right across me at the dining table. And I thought it would be fun to play, you know, toe-toe...so i started touching your toes with my legs..."
"What? But.."
"Yeah i know...only after a few seconds i realised it was your brother's leg i was on, who was sitting next to you at the table.", he stopped and added, "I felt your brother up! I'm sure he is going to kill me."
Damnit! You would have scored if only you havent done the most stupidest thing. That too, my brother.. lets run away from here.
"Lets run away from here! Start the bike fast!!", i said as i turned around to look at the door and realised we were just twenty meters away it. Horrors of horror, my brother opened the door and came running towards us and called, "Stop!".
Me and him just froze at the spot. I was so sure that a streak of unspeakable words, loaded with enough dosage of advice is coming.
"Hey k... sis, you forgot your dessert. I brought you chocolate....and this time it comes with a supplement.", he said and thrusted something into my hands, turned and left.
I waited for him to get back into the house before I opened my hands. Along with my favorite bar of chocolate there was a sachet that read *durex*.

Dedication: To my friends, Parag and Niket, who helped me think like a girl :D

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