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aut me aut nihil

aut me aut nihil = Either me or nothing. no,no... me not boosting. me have an inferiority complex and trying to compensate :D 

Wednesday, July 07, 2004 - 08:17

Of rain, dark nights and the bike drive back home...

Well, last night was rainy and dark (somebody call Bulwer or Lytton). Its June here in Pune as in many other parts of the world. But the point is that it starts raining here in June. That's right people, it starts. Stopping is a different matter altogether which occurs somewhere down the line. Don't get any ideas yet, it rains or rather drizzles like a baby pee. You better be a rain-lover or you'll have to lock urself up during these monsoon months here. (That is not a very accurate description of pune but im also not Robert Zemeckis nor do i possess the skill of Forrest Gump to describe rain.)
As i was saying last night after-a-really-pissed-day-of-work-on-non-work-and-tasteless-conferences, i was driving home(8:30 PM) in my bike (F2, pretty thing that female model who comes in the ad, yeah the same 'palat mare jaan' girl). Without announcement the rain gods decided that i was dry and i should go home wet. So they must have asked the babies who were peeing then to step aside and they must have stepped in "hand-in-that", because it started pouring CatsAndDogs(somebody tell me what is the origin of this phrase). As a natural rain-lover i welcomed it with a 'Shit!'. As it turned out i compiled a vocab of the collective noun for a pile of most animal's shit by the time i reached home.
I had my low-price helmet on. Let me assure you, its better that wearing nothing. It punishes you for not being attentive during the refraction and reflection physics class in your 7th grade. After all the reflection and refraction in the helmet's shutter flap, the twin head lights of a M-800 gets magically transformed into a bright display of a well-lighted-spaceship straight out of a Speilberg movie. I could only tell whether the vehicle is coming towards me or along me by the color shade of the lights. Yellowish means headlights, so towards me. Red shades means tail light, a vehicle along me in the vicinity. Thank God! i was not color-blind as my brother. I tried leaving the shutter open for a moment, believe me do NOT do that, it reminded me of another Physics topic, "Terminal velocity". Now i tell meself, at least my hair was kept dry by the helmet , on the bright side (on the bright side huh? comeon my first irony ever!).
I also had my expensive winter wear on. Do i have to say more. The only thing that wasn't wet on the coat was the zipper. It was all rust the next day. Now i tell meself, on the bright side, at least it got a wash after an year and i finally got rid of the sambar smell it had near the sleeves.
But the worst was still to come. What with the pinching effect on the hands, seriously? The rain pellets hits you real hard on the only directly exposed part of the body, ur hand. Whoever sung "Soft rain", come and meet me bloke! It hit on my nerve, both literally and metaphorically. On the bright side, there is NO bright side for this.
Last but not the least (probably the most often used phrase), the small puddle that gets formed between the legs and the seat. Now i know the etymology of the phrase "Wet to the balls". Every two minutes u have to do the stand up and sit down drill to let the puddle drain. I wonder what female driver do!? (please excuse the perv in me)
Rest assured, a bit while later after the initial rage has subsided and the softer-nicer clone of u takes over things take a different prespective. Although it hits u hard, after some time u tend to forget and enjoy the beauty of it, that is rain.
When you look into the beam created by your bikes headlights you would know how Microsoft got the idea for Starfield simulation screensaver. It is the closest you can get to StarWars space cruise for real. The mist like stuff that gets formed around the tyres of a fast moving vehicle. The ET special effect explained in detail above. The really small droplets of water that get past the helmet and sit on ur nose. Not to mention the adrenalin, because of the 80km+ velocity i do on the highway. Give me a slow motion camera and i give John woo a run for his money.
As much as i hated the 20 minutes drive back home, i learned to like it. Nature's way of saying "Evolve dude!", me thinks.


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